Behind the Door

So I opened my freezer's door to retrieve a bag of flash frozen chicken tenders and THIS is what greeted me on the other side:


Can you believe I'm posting this?

Here's a close up for the full effect:

Yes, I claim full responsibility for the chaos chillin' in my deep freeze. I'm strangely okay with it.

Feeling better about the state of your own freezer's contents?

That's what I'm here for...

...making other people feel better about themselves since 1974.

(A job well done, no?)

Who?

Well, you'll probably recognize her:


She's my favorite Who of all. (I think the braces are a nice touch.)

No, this is not Delaney's 'new look'. She's in another musical at the local theater.


She plays many parts: a Who, a fish, a military cadet and a circus lion. There's one scene where the comedic 'General' barks right in her ear and she keeps a completely straight face the entire time. She does not get that facial control from me. I'm really proud of her 'cause I don't know how she does it.

The lion costume is her least favorite as you can see by the expression on her face:

Here she is with her 'trainer' performing in the Circus McGherkis:


Here she is with the Cat himself (who, btw, is played by a very talented and amusing teenager):


Delaney is having a great time with everything but the makeup. She declared to me that she hates the stuff and assured me that she has no interest in wearing it off stage anytime soon.

You may be wondering where Tobias is in all of this since he loves the stage as much as his sister. Well, this time around he has taken a behind the scenes job as a spotlight operator. Here he is in the tech booth, wielding his tool:


Believe it or not, I crammed myself into that tiny space and filled in for him twice this weekend while he was at high school winter camp. As lame as it sounds, I was kind of nervous that I'd do a crummy job, but it went perfectly fine. Hooray for new skills! (I'm not sure when that one will come back into play in my life.)

Taxes, Taxes, Taxes

I filled out a check to the government this morning.

I giggled as I wrote in the memo line, "Spend it wisely".

Juvenile?

Perhaps, but it's a lot nicer than some of the other things I could have penned.

A Source of Shame No More

I've shared with you before the hideousness of my thumbnails:


No, the above is not the result of a mental disorder that inspires thumbnail mutilation, nor is it a prop that I picked up at the Witches' Corner at a Halloween shop. It is my actual thumbnail in it's natural state. (You only get to see Lefty 'cause Righty was busy helping to take the picture.)

Well, Lefty (and Righty) had an extreme makeover today, but they're the only two of my phalanges who were spoiled with such treatment. You see, about a year ago I had a manicure, my first and only one in my entire 35 years.

Did I love it? No. In fact, I never wanted to do it again.

I don't know if the guy (yes, guy) who did it was super rough or what, but my fingertips were throbbing later that night when I laid in bed. Also, my nails were so thick that I couldn't use them in the ways I was used to. Worst of all was when I'd try to scratch an itch. It was torture!

Therefore, I said never again.

However, along with the nasty ridges on my nails, I also have cracks that tear down into the nail bed. They snag on things and rip further. No matter how short I keep them, they continue to split. I've tried every product I could find that promised to strengthen and protect nails. Also, I swallow calcium pills religiously, but all to no avail.

So today, weary of my annoying and painful thumbs, I walked into a salon (not the one where the fingertip abuser works) and set myself down in a chair at the station of a lovely Asian woman. I explained that I only wanted acrylics on my thumbs and why. I kept my deformities out of sight in my lap until necessary.

When I finally did produce the offensive members, she looked at them for a long time.

"Oh, they are... they are..."

I could tell that she was running through her mental English Rolodex, looking for a euphemism for "repulsive".

She finally settled on "They are weird." which sort of surprised me, but I just laughed. I can take it. (I mean look at them.)

I guess I was expecting her to not be astonished at their appearance since she looks at different people's nails all day long. I asked her, "Have you ever seen any other nails like mine?"

"Ah...one other time, but...it because of...uh...injury."

Great. I guess this means I'm special.

Anyway, here's Lefty after her date with my new friend Kim:


And yes, Righty looks just as good.